Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Drowning with Pirates: Illuminated Dark

Here sits Wednesday, full of sunshine and the promise of Fall. The blueness of the sky screams Carribean but this is only Nashville. My head feels a little stuffy but otherwise, I feel great! I had one of those really strange dreams last night that probably means more than I want it to. The dream:

The entire scene was night black, illuminated only by the crests of the rippling water and a full white moon. The next thing I knew there was a huge ship behind my dingy coming right for me. I somehow understood that it was a pirate ship. I knew I was in deep crap! There was no way to outrun it and within moments I would be over run or boarded. Somehow I ended up into the dark cool water, sinking of course. I remember feeling the water filling my nostrils and my breath growing short. I remember thinking "its a dream, wake up now!" It was then that I realized it was a dream inside a dream and it was much harder to control. So I tried to sink quicker and deeper below the surface, my nostrils flaring in my sleep as my mind fought two states of sleeping dreams. "Wake up before you drown," and "Wake up again, you're still dreaming!"

I remember hitting the alarm as I took the last gulp of air mixed with water, violently exiting two dreams at once breathless. The last level of the dream pulled my head back to the pillow and darkness of the morning. I could hear myself thinking about how odd the dream had been; but arent I still sleeping or am I still dreaming? Even after showering, I was still thinking about the odd sensations of being trapped in two dreams at once and how unusually difficult it had been to get myself out of harms way. Typically I can seize control of my dreams; why was this time different? Did all of me make it back?

The day has been almost a fog. I dont feel the dreams anymore; just the fog. I am looking forward to the workout tonite and I hope it will be good. Hopefully the iron will get me completely back. Hopefully my patience will be revitalized. Hopefully I will be normal by then. Usually I can feel the blood sauntering through my veins, my muscles preparing for the end of the afternoon, my thoughts arguing with each other. Today there is only the echo of memories....



Andrew Stanfield said...

Wow. Strange experience. There's a Tolkien story about a man descending into a dreamworld that is as real as the earth we walk in. I used to wonder if, when we died, it was like waking up to a new morning.

Anonymous said...

I used to have very realistic and horrifying dreams everynight that I wonder if my real life is a dream, and my dreams are actually my life. I'm glad that it doesn't happen anymore, but I miss the adventurous feeling sometimes.