In my silence is the purity of the noise. The voices carry on their conversations as if I was paying attention. However; obviously I am. The day drags by and I struggle to stay inspired. I have listened to self improvement podcasts and creative photoshop tuitorials. All great information that will benefit me at some point...or so I would like to believe. The crowded space in my mind still leaves me missing something and somehow lonely. I know that keeping myself busy helps or at least, again, I would like to believe that. I skipped my coffee shop today :( and had a milkshake instead. We are one person short today; and the energy is reflective. The balance of the universe is skewed...or at least I am, to be more accurate. Seems silence is my favorite commrade these days and the slope bends downward. I guess thats ok because I always survive; much to my chagrin.
A keen feeling of mental unease, as of annoyance or embarrassment, caused by failure, disappointment, or a disconcerting event: To her chagrin, the party ended just as she arrived.
tr.v. cha·grined, cha·grin·ing, cha·grins
To cause to feel chagrin; mortify or discomfit: He was chagrined at the poor sales of his book. See Synonyms at embarrass.
Either way, the future is the same snake just with two tails and no head. The beginning and the end much the same and the body or its length having no relativity to the front or back but a duration of time between two points.